what’s the plan man part 2


I’ve moved past the initial shock of the day and now find myself very very pissed.  just one of the stages of grief to work through right?  I feel like I have a thousand yard stare, and a very real, very dangerous need to go to do some fucking damage to a credit card at a bar.  2 for 1 all night every night at the applebees right around the corner baby.

all in all I’m gonna come out of this fine.  probably.  I get 2 months of paid vacation to find a job.  I’m in a field where it’ll be fairly easy to get another job, I’ll just have to prolly relocate, but still I’m just pissed.  fuck you motherfuckers if you don’t want me anymore.  fucking assholes.  I mean, it’s not like I enjoyed my job anyway, and I was half praying most of the time they would fire me anyway.  this is way better than getting fired.  layed off with beni’s!  woohoo!  fucking motherfuckers.  so now I have the opportunity to be forced to go get a job somewhere else.  I was trying anyway, but hadn’t really put much effort into it.

I didn’t like my job.  I liked small parts of it, but for the most part, no.  I enjoyed the people I worked with, and the outpouring of support from my friends has been overwhelming.  I think I’ve got almost ten offers already from friends for me to forward my resume to.  you guys rock, even tho you’ll prolly never read these words.  My FB and my wordpress are separate. for now.  maybe some day I’ll have the balls to tell all my friends what a fucked up sick fuck I am.  I just need a tatoo across my forehead that reads “SIK FUK”.  intentionally mis-spelled.  I don’t know why, I just like it that way.

so anyway, I had a phone thing with L3 in fort worth a couple weeks ago, that I haven’t heard back from so scratch that.  I also just heard from Raytheon just yesterday about a Denver position so that’s in the works.  and of course in the part 1 of this I mentioned the call I got on the way home today from being walked out.  That one’s in Asheville NC.  yes please.

I’ve had a couple offers from guys I worked with offering letters of recommendations, I’ve had several friends tell me to send them my resume, I’ve had my mom and my dad today tell me don’t hesitate to ask them if we need help.  that’s fucking awesome.  really.  how many other people have support systems like that?  I still feel like doing some fucking damage.  to a credit card, and my liver.  I don’t really give a fuck right now.  but I know it’ll pass too.  the irrational is tempered by the rational.

the rapist wants me to see a psychiatrist.  the rapist is a psychologist and is not able to prescribe Rx.  She is recommending the psycho drugs I’m on be changed up a little bit.  so we’ll see what goes on with that.  based on what I tell her, the rapist thinks I’m either bipolar manic depressive, or just bipolar, or just depressed, or some shit like that.  I don’t remember.  don’t really give a fuck either as long as it gets fixed and gets me on an even keel again.

very very happy my family is here with me right now.  they’re the only thing keeping me sober.  I would so totally be at the bottom of a gallon by now.  fuck it.

Be prepared for the boy to feel hurt and rejected
Even if you’ve gone together for only a short time,
And haven’t been too serious,
There’s still a feeling of rejection
When someone says she prefers the company of others
To your exclusive company,
But if you’re honest, and direct,
And avoid making a flowery emotional speech when you break the news,
The boy will respect you for your frankness,
And honestly he’ll appreciate the kind of straight forward manner
In which you told him your decision
Unless he’s a real jerk or a cry baby you’ll remain friends!!!

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~ by sobriety6923 on November 9, 2010.

One Response to “what’s the plan man part 2”

  1. I found this quote on the internet just for you…

    It’s true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose it, but it’s also true that we don’t know what we’ve been missing until it arrives.

    I am hoping that if this layoff had to happen..it will turn out to be a stepping stone to something even better. That does happen..anyway..I am sure everyone is sending positive energy your way. Hang in there mister.

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