Y’know, the amount of pain you can endure and not even think about is just amazing sometimes.  When you’re a kid and you skin your knee, it’s like the world is going to end.  Granted, this is a brand new sensation and it’s exceedingly intense, and you haven’t had enough experience with it yet to deal with it well.

But, as you grow older, you deal with more and more pain.  Physical, Emotional, Stress induced, etc, etc…and you just get better with dealing with it.

My feet hurt every day.  My back hurts every day.  I get headaches sometimes.  I have chest pains (CP) and arm pains related to them a lot.  Shortness of breath (SOB) which is less pain and more annoyance too.  I just deal with it.  Shoot, skint knee?  I wish that was the least of my problems.  I’m at the point where if I don’t get hurt while riding my bike, it’s not a good ride.  Blood on Trail yo.

So now, with these chest pains and negative test results and whatnot (echo test today didn’t look bad btw, according to the tech.  will follow up with the doc for review, but the tech said there’s nothing really to write home about), a friend of mine noted something interesting.

What’s gonna happen when I have chest pains someday and it’s the real thing?  I’ll be so conditioned by then to just ignore it that something serious could be happening and I won’t even note it.  I haven’t had a drink in over a week right now.  Last thing I had was a mike’s hard lemonade 8 days ago.  Was actually starting to feel a lot better this week, then all of a sudden yesterday I had some stress with family coming to visit, and blammo, here comes the SOB and CP again.  Sugar honey iced tea.

So it gets me wondering, either

a. My heart is weak enough it can’t even handle normal stress anymore (but not weakened enough to look bad on an EKG or Echo)

2. My liver is bad enough that it can’t remove all the toxicity from the blood anymore and if affects my heart more

C. some combo of a and 2

D. when I drink and then stop my body gives me withdrawal symptoms that consist of the SOB and CP.  Drinking level is low or nonexistent then all of a sudden a spike, then nothing and my body’s saying hey wtf.

3. I’m just finally old enough where the old joke is realized:  you’ll know you’re getting old when “I just can’t drink like I used to” replaces “I’ll NEVER.DRINK.THAT MUCH. AGAIN.”

I spose I could just greatly simplify everything and never drink again.ever. but….b,b,b,but…..


~ by sobriety6923 on May 27, 2011.

5 Responses to “Pain”

  1. Blah Blah Blah! Hate the pain your are going through, then do something about it! Stop complaining and change your lifestyle!

  2. Eight days!! You rock!!

    BOOYAH!!! 🙂

  3. well damn red, just rip me a new one then. go on witcha bad self mickey. just to be clear….this is my blog and I can bitch, whine, complain, etc….all the expletive deleted I want to on it. hope you and the fam have a great trip tho.

    and to the 2nd red to comment, thank you.

    see what I did there? it’s funny, b/c you’re both red heads, and I referenced that in my comment. that’s funny, right?

  4. but ya, I know what you’re saying. quit yer bitchin and do something about it. thanks for the cbt.

  5. Sounds like some amazing bike rides you’re taking! I love hitting the trails myself. Those moments where you can stop and enjoy’s being among God’s creations…closest thing to Heaven!

    Riding makes the heart muscles stronger…let it also make your spirit stronger as well.

    Rock on!

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